The sign

You have a set of words above your bed

      Always kiss me goodnight.

At first we selected them because it sounded cutesy and appropriate for your room. When you came home it became much more than that to me.

 There were nights I'd be exhausted, at my boiling point, overwhelmed, and defeated - then I'd look up from the floor where I was perched with you (often times because I was so exhausted I didn't want to be in the chair with you and drop you. I felt the floor was much safer for us both) and I'd see those words.....

Initially you really just needed a few things and, other than food, you really only needed your dad and I to love you. You didn't need correction, discipline, or guidance....you just needed us to love you. Those words were nightly reminders to me to push aside my needs for yours because you needed me.

Now that you are a little older you need a little more that mere "love" - you do need guidance, correction, to be taught right from wrong, play time, limits set, encouragement, and direction. So from the moment you awaken, with your cheerful and bright smile, we spend the day providing you with these things.

But at the end of the day it always comes down to the fact that you need our love. You always will.

Every night before you go to sleep (even if you put up a fight!) we always kiss you goodnight. That's guarantee.

Those words placed above your crib have such great meaning to me now....much more than I had ever anticipated.

They have reminded me to be patient with you and with myself.
They have reminded me to care for you with every ounce of strength I have left even when I feel as if I am running on empty.

They have reminded me that you need me. You dependon me. You are a part of me.
They have reminded me that we were going to go through growing pains together. You, becoming you. Me, becoming parental Me.
They reminded me that no matter what the day held, how hard the day was, how furiously you pushed my buttons, and how tired I felt.....

               I love you.