Where do we begin......Ah, yes about 2 1/2 weeks prior to Ellie's birth my OB-GYN discovered that I had mild pre-eclampsia. She ordered me to a week of bedrest, which I did not comply with because Justin and I were so close to finishing our clinical hours. She eventually decided that my blood pressures were high enough and proteins in my urine were high enough that she wanted to induce me. So she set the date - Sunday Feb 7th.
We went in on Sunday at 730 pm and it all went down the crapper from there.
I came at 730 and was checked in and admitted and it took hours before I saw a doctor to start the induction.
We were ANTI using misoprostol to induce labor and PRO cervadil --- we were told we had to use misoprostol and that the hospital doesn't carry anything else.....Misoprostol is not FDA approved for inducing labor and it comes with many side effects, but cervadil's whole function is to induce labor. Misoprostol has to be put in every 4 hours but cervadil is a one time dose....BUT Misoprostol is 42 cents a tablet and cervadil is like $150. We were pretty much told we had to use the misoprostol - ok we WERE told.
We were also told that I was going to be bolused with Magnesium Sulfate to "prevent" me from having a seizure during this induction. I refused the Mag Sulfate because I didn't really feel that I was at risk and the pro/cons of using the Mag Sulfate led us to decide it was not appropriate.
These two decisions made the doctors mad.......very mad.
Once the misoprostol had done its work the pitocin started - which starts contractions - and that was a nightmare. The nurses LOADED me up and my contractions were coming so strong and so fast that my body could not catch up with the pain. I had gone au natural and I was in excruciating pain (solely in my lower back), and my blood pressure was climbing into the 160's over 110's and Justin and I knew we had to remedy the situation or I'd end up with mag sulfate. The nurse turned down the pitocin 4 x's and the contractions were still constant - literally with 1-2 seconds of reprieve. So we made the heartbreaking decision to have an epidural, and while I was having the epidural our OB-GYN had a talk with Justin about our decisions up to this point and her disdain with them and pretty much with us as patients.
At 7 pm on Monday the OB-GYN came in and said "By dawn you'll have a baby!" We were excited as we felt this labor process was coming to a close. At the time she said this I was 5 cm dilated, and theoretically (on average) women progress at 1 cm per hour after 5 cm. So 10 pm, 11 pm, midnight all come and go and no baby. A new doctor had come in by this time and I was checked every other hour after 7 pm and by 2 am on Tuesday I was only 9 cm dilated. At 230 am the doctor came in and said the baby appeared to have turned in an odd position or was my pelvis wasn't large enough to accomodate the baby. A C-Section was inevitable - so we prepped for the OR.
They wheeled me in, pumped me full of medication, and the show began. I, of course, don't know much of what happened from my chest down but the anesthesia gave me the shakes and very nauseated. I had not had anything to eat or drink (other than ice chips) since 630 pm on Sunday (plus no sleep either!), and dry heaving was all I could do. Ellie came at 331 am - she cried 2-3 times and then we quickly in Justin's arms all warm and cozy. He brought her to me and I kissed her cheek and then they quickly escorted them out the door. I was left behind to be put back together. I could hear bits and pieces of disconcerting conversation including "Oh make sure you put her uterus on top of her stomach," and "I think that should bleed nicely." I was freaking out - I wanted to move and jump off the table but fortunately I was unable to! I continued with the shakes and dry heaving well into the recovery room.
I was taken into the recovery room where Justin and Ellie were awaiting me - it was the most beautiful sight I'd ever seen. I was able to breastfeed her (after my shaking stopped!) and hold her in my arms. After 2 hours of this bliss we were wheeled to the Mother Speciality Care unit where I remained until we were discharged. It was a rough few days on this unit as people come in constantly day and night to check up on you. I had my own nurses and Ellie had her own coming down from the nursery to check on her. We had her room in with us so we could spend time with her and I could continue to feed her like I was supposed to.
This simply resulted in Justin and I feeling defeated - was I feeding her enough, was I feeding her often enough, was I holding her in the right position, and being chastized because we weren't doing her feedings every 3 hours on the dot (Ms. Ellie LOVES her sleep!!). Nothing makes you feel like a failure as not being able to feed your child.
The first day post-op my feet/legs swelled up like the Michelin man and I started to bruise around my joints - it hurt to walk or move. I knew that moving was my ticket out of this hole so I made myself walk get out of bed just hours after the C-section. I was going to the bathroom alone, getting out of bed, breastfeeding, and going down the halls. In the end it paid off because we were told we'd be in the hospital at least 4 days, but 2 days post op we were discharged. The only pain mgmt I did from the onset and up to this point has been Ibuprofen first thing in the morning.
Justin was the greatest birthing partner of all times. He never left my side, rubbed my back, encouraged me, held me, and we shared in one of the hardest experiences of our lives together. Everything we had planned for this birth went wrong - not just a little wrong but horribly wrong. However, every time we look at Ellie those feelings dissipate, and we can see that it was worth it.
We are finally home, and it has felt surreal.
I am 2 weeks old now and I like to lay on the floor and explore....
I am getting so BIG - I've grown an inch an a half since I was born and gained a few ounces here and there.....
Things I like: sleeping during the day, my pacifier, being held, my mom, my dad, rocking in my rocking chair, watching TV in my bouncer, going for walks, going to class with mom and dad, and playing on my monkey mat
.............Daddy's love at 4 a.m.
Ellie Sophia White.........
Dear baby,
We are not fully done with our clinical hours - we've been doing hours at Rio Rancho High, some shifts at the Pediatric ER (12 hour shifts on your feet when you are 38 weeks prego is NOT fun!), a few nights we go to a child birth class for teen parents as part of our clinical rotation which is from 6pm-9pm, we still have classes, we have home visits to do for clinicals, and poor Justin is also still working. Life is chaotic.....on top of trying to figure out how to cope with the impending birth of our little "bump."